Why the Fuck Are You In My Car
by pandagirl247
Summary: As Sango, a high school student, is driving home from the movies, she gets a surprise visit from Miroku, another high school student, from whom she demands an explanation. He spends the next hour trying to explain himself. I wrote this oneshot in the middle of the night but it's pretty thoroughly planned out and I hope some of you enjoy it :)


Like I always do when I get into my car alone, I lock the doors right away. Nothing is wrong with being worried about getting kidnapped, especially after just coming out of a scary movie at night and parting ways with the friend I was with.

I start my car and let out a heavy breath, waiting for the heat to kick in, turning up the Fratellis CD currently in my stereo and releasing my parking brake before switching into drive.

As I pull out of the parking lot, my windshield is suddenly coated in an increasingly thick sheet of rainwater. I roll my eyes but smile; I love rain, it just isn't the easiest to drive in, especially in the dark. I begin singing along to my CD to cope, blasting the words as I join the stream of cars on the highway. For about ten minutes, this is bliss.

I sigh as I hit the first clump of traffic, only ten minutes from home otherwise. Of course, it's nearly 6 pm on a Thursday, and my GPS shows an accident up ahead. I half-heartedly look into my rearview window to check whether someone is behind me, as one would do naturally, just to be aware of my surroundings, but rather than casually getting a clear view through the back window, I nearly crash into the person in front of me.

"Shit, sorry! Fuck, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out," comes the embarrassed yet amused voice of Miroku, a guy in my English class, the guy who wears his thick dark hair in a ponytail even though he could just cut it off if he doesn't want it in his face and whose eyes are the most interesting shade of blue I've ever seen. Who the hell has indigo eyes? Nobody. It frustrates me. Miroku, who I find myself psychoanalyzing during class and rolling my eyes at fifty times a day, who just happens to be in my backseat.

I stare, stunned. "What the hell?" is all I can manage to ask.

"I can explain!"

I stare, eyebrows raised, heart racing from fear. I'd be worried, but he isn't making any moves to kidnap me, and..I don't think he would.

"Sango, the road!"

I whip my head around towards the cars, in front of me, which moved up about a foot. I follow suit, then return my attention to the teenage boy in my car.

"Please don't crash your car."

"Put your seatbelt on."

He positions himself in the middle seat and locks its seatbelt into place.

"Are you stalking me?" I ask frankly.

"No! I promise, no, fuck, you weren't even supposed to find me."

"That sounds even more stalker-ish."

He lets out a deep breath. "I can explain, I promise. It's a long story."

I look toward the traffic in front of me, which isn't moving. "I've got time."

"Okay...it started a few days ago when Inuyasha told me that he has feelings for Kagome."

_It was Monday, during homeroom._

_"Miroku, I'm gonna have to cut you off," Inuyasha interjected._

_Miroku stopped mid-sentence. "Huh? Why?"_

_"I uh...I have something important to tell you."_

_"Oh? What is it? I'm all ears."_

_Inuyasha looked shiftily around the room, his eyes landing on Kagome, who had been talking to Sango for the past few minutes. "You may have a lot to say about Sango, but do you know anything about her friend over there?"_

_Miroku looked into his friend's eyes. "Kagome? She's pretty cute, I can tell you that. Definitely one of the prettiest in our grade."_

_"Hey, you don't get to go around and just call her that," Inuyasha shot back, mildly flustered._

_Miroku smiled. "I can say whatever I want; she isn't your girlfriend. Not yet, anyway."_

_"Huh?"_

_Miroku put his arm around his friend and stared up into the distance like one would in a movie. "Don't fret, my friend. Soon, she will be yours."_

"Do you have to be telling me all of this in the third person?" I interrupt, lurching my car forward another foot. "It's really annoying."

"It adds showmanship!"

I glare at him, and he just grins back at me with his eyebrows raised. I look back to the blur of lights on the road. "Fine. Another thing, though...you told me that Inuyasha confessed to having feelings for Kagome, but in your story, he never actually says that he does."

He takes a few seconds before responding. "I suppose I may have jumped the gun on that one...but if he didn't have feelings for her, this next part wouldn't make sense."

"Alright, alright. Continue."

_"I don't need to own her, Miroku," Inuyasha objected, shrugging away from the arm around his shoulders._

_"We can work out the details later. But I'm here for you, comrade, to aid in your quest. Together, we will get the girl."_

_"Why are you so fucking dramatic?"_

"You are extremely dramatic," I point out.

"Just let me tell the story!"

I roll my eyes and inch forward again.

"I told Inuyasha that if he wants to woo Kagome, he should try to connect with her through her interests."

"Alright, that's fair," I comment. "But I have a question."

"Shoot."

"What the everloving fuck does this have to do with you being in my car?" I shoot him another raised-eyebrow glare.

"Patience, patience! I'm getting there!"

I can see a hint of genuine fear in his eyes, and I turn around, smiling quietly to myself. "So what happened next?"

He clears his throat. "I suggested that he ask her for her number and start up a conversation over text or, if that was too scary, stalk her Instagram."

"But let me guess, he decided to do something a little more...stupid?"

Miroku chuckles. "I wouldn't call it stupid, just not as fool-proof."

"Hard to do something fool-proof when you're a fool yourself."

"Hey, don't bash my best friend like that; his heart's in the right place."

"It better be if he's courting my friend."

"I can assure you, he only wants the best for them both."

"So what happened?"

"Well, we had just overheard Kagome making plans to go see a movie with you this weekend."

"You were eavesdropping on us? Definitely not convincing me that you aren't a stalker."

"You're both naturally loud talkers!"

"Analyzing our speech patterns? Something a stalker would do..."

"I'm not-" he lets out a breath with a laugh inside it. "Listen, we just happened to overhear the two of you talking before this conversation happened."

_"Gosh, the weather is getting really cold, I really wish I had someone to snuggle up with," Kagome expressed, her eyes dreamy._

_"Me too," Sango agreed, her eyes drifting toward Miroku, who stood only a few feet away. She wanted him closer._

"Oh shut up!" I exclaim. "Don't forget I have the ability to crash this car right now."

He's grinning cheek to cheek. "I am merely telling the story how I remember it, Sango. I'm an artist! Anecdotes don't have to be accurate, as long as they get the right message across. Come on, we just learned about this in class."

"What message is this getting across, exactly?"

He clears his throat. "Maybe I improvised on your part a bit...but Kagome's was accurate."

"...that actually does sound like something she'd say."

"Precisely."

_Sango gave her friend an encouraging smile. "I'm sure you could find a winter boyfriend, Kagome. There are plenty of guys who probably want the same thing."_

_"Yeah, but I want something real! I can't just ask anyone. How will I know if they actually like me?"_

_"That's fair...who knows; maybe something will come along."_

_"What about you?"_

_"Me? I don't need a boyfriend."_

_"Oh, come on, Sango. Nobody needs a boyfriend, but having one is nice...someone to cuddle with and call late at night and drive around late at night just the two of you, not going anywhere in particular but enjoying each other's company..."_

_"I like driving around by myself, just me and my CDs," Sango objected jokingly. "But who knows, maybe a guy will come along and buy me a CD and we can listen to it together."_

_"That'd be cute!"_

_"Only then would I consider a man worthy enough of my attention. He must buy me the perfect CD," she continued dramatically, her sarcasm overwhelming._

"Hey, you don't have to recount our entire conversation, you know," I blurt out hesitantly. "I get it, you have an incredible memory."

Miroku sighs. "As you wish."

_"I think I'd like a guy who I can watch movies with," Kagome replied. "Someone who likes the same kind of movies I do."_

_"Speaking of movies, there's that new horror film in theaters right now; want to go together this weekend?" Sango suggested, directing the conversation away from boys._

_"A horror film? I don't know; those always make me scared..."_

_Sango laughed. "That's kind of the point. We don't have to go, but I've been wanting to see it, and it'd be fun to go with you."_

_Kagome smiled. "Alright, I'm in. Friday?"_

"Okay, this is starting to make sense," I offer, not sure if I mean it. "But we went tonight instead of tomorrow."

"It all comes together, I promise," Miroku confirms. "But can you guess Inuyasha's idea now?"

_"You want me to learn about her interests?" Inuyasha asked Miroku, repeating what he had just explained to him._

_"Exactly. Find some common ground."_

_"Huh...she and Sango are going to that movie Friday...I could go see it, and then we'd have something to talk about."_

_"That's one way to do things...but Inuyasha, you don't like horror movies."_

_"So?" he asked, getting defensive. "She does, right? If she's going to see one?"_

_"Well, actually she said-"_

_"I don't need your help, Roku, I can figure this out myself."_

_"Alright, you're right; you don't need my help," Miroku agreed, calmly. "I would like to help you, as a friend. How about we go see the movie together this Thursday. That way, you'll have a whole day to think about it and plan what to say, and it'll be fresh in her mind and therefore interesting when you two talk about it."_

_"So you wanna see it Thursday?"_

_"Sounds like a plan."_

"Alright, so that explains why you two were here tonight, but why didn't you two just join us when you found out we were here tonight?"

"We didn't see you two until after the movie," Miroku explains, "but either way, I think Inuyasha would have been too nervous."

I stare at the line of cars in front of me for a few seconds, now numb to my own impatience.

"Shall I continue?"

"Yeah, this still doesn't explain what you could possibly be doing in my car."

"I'm getting to that. After the movie, we spotted you two coming out of the theater and followed you out of the building."

"Oh, so you were stalking us," I joke.

"Your definition of stalking worries me. No, when we got outside, Inuyasha told me that he wanted to go talk to Kagome."

"But of course you didn't just come up and talk to us like normal people."

"He was determined to do it all by himself, and...he didn't want to walk up to her while you were there."

I look back at him. "Why not?"

He doesn't make eye contact. "You can be a little scary with guys, Sango. He was afraid you'd shut him down without giving him a chance." He continues before I can respond. "I know you'd just be trying to protect Kagome, but try telling someone as stubborn as Inuyasha to change his plans."

I look back toward the road. "Fair."

"So, we waited until the two of you had said your goodbyes, and then he told me to wait for him while he went up to talk to her." He stops after that, and I give him a few seconds.

"Alright, so how the hell did you end up in my car?"

"Right...uh, well..."

I hear a faint, music box melody, and Miroku answers his phone.

"Where the hell are you?" asks Inuyasha's voice on the other end. "Did you find what you were looking for?"

"Hey, Yash!" He sounds embarrassed. "Listen, I'm kind of in Sango's car right now."

"What, did she catch you and kidnap you?"

I send a glare tinted with confusion into the backseat. "Hi, Inuyasha," I shout.

"Ah, shit. Hey, Sango, how's it going?" I can tell he's poking fun at Miroku.

"Pretty good, I just wish your friend here would tell me why he was in my car. So far, he's telling me the whole thing's your fault."

"My fault? That dumbass is blaming me for this? Bullshit."

"Hey, it was your idea!" Miroku protests.

"Only 'cause you wouldn't shut up about her and those damn CDs."

"CDs?" I repeat.

"You're the one who wanted to go to the movies," Miroku counters. "And who told me to look in her car."

"Hold on," I interject, "what's this about CDs?"

"After he heard you talking about wanting a guy to give you a CD, this idiot wouldn't shut up about how picky you are, how most girls in the school would accept his stupid advances but you wouldn't; he got all pissy over it an' decided if he was gonna flirt with you he couldn't do it like you were an 'ordinary woman' or some other bullshit. Told me he wanted to buy you a CD for Christmas."

"That's quite enough, Inuyasha," Miroku suggests anxiously. "She doesn't need to know-"

"It didn't make much sense to me," Inuyasha continues without a second thought. "He was all mad about it, but it seems to me he just wanted to flirt with you like he does with everyone else. I wanted him to shut up about it and maybe be serious for two seconds, so I started talking about Kagome, which he jumped on immediately. Who knew Miroku was the king of projection?"

I've been looking at Miroku this whole time, and his eyes finally meet mine. Neither of us can look away.

A startling beep from behind me pulls my eyes back toward the road. Finally, traffic is moving fluidly again.

"Look, I'll call you later, Yash," Miroku says into the phone. "Drive safe." The call ends.

"I'll drop you off at home," I offer, now unable to take my eyes off the road. "But please, finish your story."

"Before Inuyasha went off to talk to Kagome, he told me I should go look at all the CDs you already have to figure out what I should get you since your car was there. I didn't take him seriously at first. I wasn't going to break into your car, but you unlocked it..."

"And then I went back inside because I forgot my jacket."

"Yeah...so...I thought I could just take a quick peek before you got back..."

"Idiot," I muster, shaking my head.

"I won't deny that. Looking back, my actions were ill-advised. I blame Inuyasha."

"And yet, you were the one who decided to sneak into my car."

"When I saw you coming back, my instinct was to dive in the back."

We ride in silence the rest of the way, aside from him telling me how to get to his house. When I pull into the driveway, I burst into laughter.

"Sango?" he says, concerned.

"Get up here so I can talk to you face to face." I pat the passenger seat and watch Miroku climb awkwardly from the back to the front of my car. "You could have just gotten out and back in..."

"And ruin the aura? I'll pass."

I shake my head in disbelief. "You broke into my car because you didn't know what CD to buy me."

"Yes."

"Ever think of just asking?"

"Hey, remember that whole story about Inuyasha avoiding confrontation?"

I smile, surprising myself. "Did you find anything?"

"I found too much. Your CD collection is wildly inconsistent. There's no way to confirm whether you'd like what I get you."

"I think that might be more an error in your method than in my taste."

"What was the one you were listening to while driving? I liked it, but I could barely hear it over your singing. If that's what you'd call it."

"Oh god, you heard all of that, didn't you?"

"Every bit." He reaches to turn up the volume on the stereo, which has been running my CD on mute for the past hour. "Oh, there we go, I can hear it now."

"Do you still like it?" I look into his indigo eyes, wanting a genuine answer.

"I do, I do, maybe more so," he jokes, but gets caught up in my stare, and our eyes are locked again.

I blink and turn my head to face forward. "You should probably go inside; I'm sure this is much later than you planned to be out."

"Oh, no, not at all. Mushin's probably asleep, anyways, and I'm sure he'd rather hear that I was out with a pretty girl than sulking around the house."

I look toward him again. "Ah, see, now I just feel like all the other girls you flirt with. Like Inuyasha said."

His eyebrows invert themselves. "No, no, Sango..." He grabs one of my hands in both of his. "You are unlike any other woman I've met."

"Because I won't accept your advances."

"No, because I genuinely want to get to know you."

I slide my hand out from between his. "Like you told Inuyasha, that's just how you get women to pay attention to you."

"Sango, I want to get to know you as a friend."

When his eyes capture me again, his expression is more genuine than it has been all night. Mine softens to match, and I place my freed hand against his cheek. It may be warm from the car's heat, but I think he's blushing. I don't think I've seen him blush before. He flirts with people every day, but I've never noticed this much color in his face while doing so.

"It's too hot in here," I mutter, taking my attention and my hand away to turn down the heat. He puts a hand under my chin and turns my head back toward him, meeting my gaze purposefully, his eyes still soft. I see confusion behind them, but his confusion makes me surer. In the next second, the first half makes up an hour's worth of staring, but the second half is all it takes for our lips to meet, and once they do, I have no desire to stop them. Both of my hands meet the sides of his face, he holds my shoulders, I run one hand through his hair, he lightly holds my waist, I pull him in by his shirt collar.

When we break, after how long I cannot tell, his cheeks reflect the color of strawberries, and I cannot imagine that mine are any different. Somehow, his hair has come loose and is amiss around his head, and his eyes have more feeling in them than the eyes of anyone I've ever seen. I tuck a piece of my own hair behind my ear, then remove it again, then slowly run a hand through the mess atop his head, slightly pulling it in the back before I release it, unsure of where to then put my hand.

He takes it in his and kisses it gently, all without looking away from my eyes. I release a breath I had been unknowingly holding in.

"It's a school night," I manage to say, stupidly, as if I actually want to stop.

"You should get home," he suggests, his glistening look of awe not diminishing in the slightest. "I'll see you in the morning."

I nod and smile, and he looks about to open the door and break the tension, let some air in, but he kisses me again before he does, in a way as meaningful as the first one, in a way that causes us to part with smiles, and when the car door opens and the aura dissolves into a new moment, I am satisfied with that ending and with this new beginning, comforted by the possibility of an unknown.

*I wrote this between 11:46 pm and 3:35 am, and I refuse to read it over to correct anything or to even proofread it. It must be presented this way. I hope you enjoy it as is*


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